Snow and ice

snow sculptures. Each of these sculptures is at least fifteen feet high.

This one was the overall winner. I can see why!

A whale tail.

The photographer taking the picture of the "last spike".

Looks like poutine. But it is a beaver. Unaccountably mounted on a pedestal.

Sir John A MacDonald. First prime minister of Canada, and the driving force behind building the first railroad across this land.
See the idea inside his mind in the pic below?

Another whale tail. Guess the Camel toe is over on the other side.

Below is the New Brunswick flag, slightly re arranged.

Mardi Gras

click on this image to enlarge. I would like to know just how many sit ups it takes to get abs like those! This image is from the Candian news site....Canoe. http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Microgalleries/home.html
(this post will be removed within the week...just wanted to share the joy of what Canoe has to offer)

Gracyanne Barbosa, queen of the drums' section of Mangueira samba school, performs at the Sambodrome in Rio de Janeiro, Tuesday, Feb. 24, 2009. Click here for a full Mardi Gras gallery. (AP Photo/Natacha Pisarenko)

Dear Dad

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to:"DAD"

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.

"Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with you and Mom. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tatoos, motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion....Dad, she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter."We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone."We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstacy. In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry, Dad."I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself."Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren."

Love,

Your son, John.

P.S. Dad, none of this is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card that's in my desk's center drawer. I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home."

Chuck in Montana

Young Chuck in Montana bought a horse from a farmer for $100.

The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day.

The next day came and the farmer arrived without the horse.

He said, "Sorry, Son, but I have some bad news.

The horse died."

Chuck replied, "Well, then, just give me my money back."

The farmer said, "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."

Chuck said, "Well, then, just bring me the dead horse."

The farmer asked, "What ya goin' to do with him?"

Chuck said, "I'm going to raffle him off."

The farmer said, "You can't raffle off a dead horse."

Chuck said, "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's dead."

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked,

"What happened with that dead horse?"

Chuck said, "I raffled him off.

I told 500 tickets at two dollars apiece and made a profit of $998."

"Didn't anyone complain?" the farmer said.

Chuck said, "Just the guy who won. I gave him his money back."

Chuck grew up and now works for the government.

He's currently figuring out how to give us our money back.

Art

How do people "think" of these things? Maybe thats what happens when you put a fine arts major into a job in a junk yard.

naaaaahhhhhh.

These are all auto rims and hubcaps. How cool is that?

Sugar

Winterlude

I guess its a take on the word "interlude". Every February Ottawa takes a chance that they can dodge the mid winter thaw and have a mid winter party. So far, they have batted 3 out of 10, thereabouts. Oh well...the warm weather is nice, though the fella in the picture below clearly does not think so.

Some of the ice sculptures are really big!
People come from all over the world to make ice sculptures. I wonder what this Jamaican really thinks of the cold?

Above is the flying pig. My favorite. I think it was finished for about a half hour before the thaw started icicles to form off the big fella's snout!

Christmas Time

Above is Joanne, reading her christmas cards.

Lorne, Joanne and me.

Lorne had been out of the country over Christmas, so his daughter made him a traditional Christmas dinner, with gifts under the Christmas tree and carols and turkey and too much wine. At the beginning of February. Lee and Becs finally got their much anticipated "white Christmas", and a good time was had by all. Well, except for Brenda, who was fighting off a flue. This was a coup by Lorne's daughter Laura and his GF.

The Trocks

Click on the above to enlarge, and see what Brenda describes as some of the ugliest girls to ever put on a tutu.

Brenda has a subscription to the ballet. Specifically the National Arts Centre series of advanced booked shows which generally consist of ballets, though they DID include the Japanese "Kodo Drummers" and "Shakespeare's Dog". But without much complaint on my part, I accompany her and Elizabeth to various entertainments. I tend to avoid the highbrow entertainments, but I DO have to admit that a group of individuals working at entertaining me is usually better than shivering my ass off in the stands watching a group of bored overpaid individuals shoving a puck around on the ice. Sometimes. And don't forget I grew up in a family of dancers....albeit Ukrainian Cossack Dancers. So I can appreciate dance...no matter WHAT Brenda says. (I think she is right that I have little to no interest in a true "classical" ballet though. Why she doesn't want to come with me to watch the pole dancers in the club up the road and see some "good" dancing is just as inexplicable, but I digress.)

This time it was the Company of Trocaderos della Monte Carlo. I remember them playing along side Kermit and Miss Piggy as they performed "Swine Lake". The humour has only got raunchier and eathier since that memorable gig. The Trocks are an all male dance troupe who, in fine medieval tradition, play both the male and female roles during their performances. Of course, they pick performances which are really heavy weighted to traditional female roles...such as "Swan Lake", their signature piece, the "dying swan" and an abstract dance piece specfically choreographed for four divas of dance back in the 19th century. So the costumes are outrageously female...pink tutus and pointe shoes. So it was a choice between staying at home playing video games, going out and killing myself on the snowboard slopes, or watching a group of grown men prancing around in tutus and wigs. Since a train wreck was not one of the choices, I stayed to watch the Trocks.

http://www.trockadero.org/

From the Wikipedia....

The dancers portray both male and female (mainly female) roles in a humorous style that mixes send-ups of the clichés of ballet, posing, and physical comedy with "straighter" pieces intended to show off the performers' skill (but still with a certain amount of humour). Part of the comedy is seeing male dancers en travesti performing moves usually reserved to females, such as dancing en pointe.

Part of the humour is the phoney biographies of the actors. A couple are re-printed here, again, from the Wikipedia. They make amusing reading in the interval as you seat yourself and await the start of the show.

-----from the Wikipedia.
Robert Carter
Born in Charleston, South Carolina, USA; he joined the Trocks in November 1995. He portrays Yuri Smirnov and Olga Supphozova.
Yuri ran away from home and joined the Kirov Opera because he thought Borodin was a prescription barbiturate, but he soon discovered that he didn't know his arias from his elbow and decided to become a ballet star instead. Olga made her first public appearance in a KGB lineup under dubious circumstances and after a seven-year-to-life hiatus, she now returns to her adoring fans.
Edgar Cortes
Born in Santiago do Cacem, Portugal; he joined the Trocks in October 2000. He portrays Klaus Youssoupovtu and Maria Gertrudes Clubfoot.
Klaus soared into prominence as the first defector whose leave-taking was accomplished at the virtual insistence of the defectees. Maria (after ballerina Maria Tallchief) is the last one of the great Indian ballerinas, who began her training with the Wounded Knee Ballet but was subsequently banned for use of traditional Indian weaponry.

Here is a good site you might like to check out...it has clips of the actors.

Otherwise, I would say, "Get off the computer and get shoveling that snow!"

http://www.trockstour.co.uk/ (Brenda says this site shows some really ugly women!) Me, I just want to know how they did that web site because it is the best example of scripting I have ever seen!

Tuesday Toons

The Mom Song.

Four megabyes of hilarity. Turn it up LOUD!

3-D tattoos

Too lazy today to actually write a post, but I DID find some nice pictures on line to share. Its Tuesday Toon day, but alas, a couple of days late, so it will have to be Thursday Toon day instead. TTFN.
I have a hard time believing that the above is even real. I HOPE that is just a painting. I may hope in vain however.

Airbrush I think.

As is the lizard. But body decoration is body decoration, paint or tattoo, makes no difference. These are way cool.

These last two are in my humble opinion, actual tattoos. The fella down below probably needed something to distract attention from the rest of his body. (oooh, thats cruel isn't it! But you were thinking it just the same.) On the other hand, his taste in artwork is superb.

Martial Arts Saturday

Featuring Shaolin Monks all the way from the world famous Shaolin Temple (China), the coming 2009 Martial Arts Gala is for sure a hot one. The Monks will be doing martial arts performances, including feats such as throwing needles through thick glass; break steel plates with heads and breaking various objects using their bodies.
In addition to the Monk’s demonstration, there are varies martial arts schools also performing wushu, kung-fu, ving tsun, taekwondo, karate, aikido, Chen’s taichi and medieval swords.
Additional entertainment includes tap dances, cultural dances, musical instrument performances and door prizes.
It is normally expensive to watch such an exciting Gala; however, this event ticket is very affordable. We acknowledge the support from the Government of Ontario & the Chinese Embassy to make this event possible.

Date:
January 24, 2009
Saturday 7pm

Location:
Kailash Mital Theatre
(Alumni A）, Southam Hall,
Carleton University, Ottawa

Ticket:
$12 & $18
(100% SOLD)

This is where I will be on Saturday. More information here....

http://www.gala2009.tk/

Active week

Lee ordering two more beaver tails at Pat Hooker's Beaver Tail kiosk on the Canal. I don't think Jennifer could work there...its pretty nippy.

Lee and Bex at the mile zero of the canal. Ah love, how strong thou art to make thee don skates and follow this man to frozen Canada. In the background, behind Lee's right shoulder is the Parliament buildings. Over his left shoulder is the old train station, now used as a conference centre.

On the other hand, hot maple syrup poured into the snow forms tasty taffee. So there ARE compensations.

Leon and I spent the the week building Susanna's armour. This is about one third my work and two third Leon's work.

While Leon was happily bashing steel, I worked at polishing the bayonettes. Unfortunately they were needed this week for a funeral...aaannnnddd...they were not ready. Ah well. We do what can.

There is a surprisingly large amount of work involved in preparing a metal piece for plating. The bayonettes are pretty rough, general issue stamped out pieces that need a LOT of work to take off the rough edges. You don't see the blades, so I just wrapped the blade in black duct tape to protect my hands. They will not be plated or prepared in any way.

More on my shop activities on my armouring blog http://southtowerarmouringguild.blogspot.com/

Tuesday toons, belated...

ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659 --- CASE OF THEPREGNANT LADY

A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticedthe man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved toanother seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver and he had theman arrested.

The case came up in court.The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say for himself.The man replied, 'Well your Honor, it was like this, when the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat down under a sign that said, 'The Double Mint Twins are coming' and I grinned.Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, 'Logan's Liniment will reduce the swelling,' and I had to smile. Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said, 'William's Big Stick Did the Trick,' and I could hardly contain myself. But, Your Honor, when She moved the fourthtime and sat under a sign that said, 'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this accident'... I just lost it.

''CASE DISMISSED!!'

Friends visiting.

click on the images to enlarge. Rebecca in front of a pile of snow.

Leon and Rebecca purchasing skates.

Canadian sporting activities

And leisure activities

Rebecca and Mya.