Sunday, December 16, 2007

Hockey

(click on image to enlarge)

IS YOUR KID'S HOCKEY TAKING OVER YOUR LIFE???


· You base the next purchase of your new vehicle on whether it will hold six kids, six sticks, and six hockey bags.

· You know the location of every Tim Horton's within a 400 mile radius.

· You relate directions to places by the nearest arena.

· Knows every single kid on every single team your child has ever played on... But doesn't have a clue who his school mates are.

· You feel lost when you have a free weekend.

· Your spouse waits until you decide where to sit and then chooses a spot on the opposite side of arena.

· You become a partner in a skate sharpening business to save money.

· Can justify complaining about someone who gives hundreds of hours of volunteer time to your son or daughter.

· You ground your kids for a week (except for hockey practice).

· Can rationalize spending $159 on a Synergy for a 9 year old but won't spend $5 on a Birthday card for his wife.

· When someone asks how old your children are you respond, "I have a '94 and a '97."

· Has had to use a grandparent to take kid #1 to a tournament because Dad was in a Different province with kid #2 at a tournament and Mom had kid #3 two provinces away in a 3rd tournament all in one weekend.

· Has more miles on '05 minivan than a '66 Chevy

· Practices make up a very large part of your social life.

· You buy gloves according to how loud you can clap in them.

· You find yourself missing the parents of your child's team mates during the off-season.

· You refuse to make any plans with your friends until you check your kids' hockey schedule. · Takes out a home loan to pay for all the equipment and expenses.

· All computer passwords begin with "hock ey" or contain child's number.

· Has been barred from more than one rink on more than one occasion

· Purchases new $135.00 stick because old one "didn't have any goals left in it."

· Knows a few 5 year olds that are good but "lack focus".

· Asked to decide between try-out and first communion - asked church what his options were.

· Received a letter from AAA Automobile Club and called for more info about tryouts.


See you at the rink!

3 comments:

Unknown said...

A guy I work with is is this into his son's High School Football
"CAREER"

'scuse me? Don't careers equal JOBS- EQUAL MONEY- ???

He's got an ego the size of the stadium and he's a SOPHOMORE....

Weary Hag said...

Great read and oh my, I could just imagine how accurate this is. My daughter very casually played soccer for a time during Junior High School ... at the games, I could see some parents sporting MAJOR issues in this regard. Very funny post!

Anonymous said...

Here I have hundreds of travel pictures of my own to post, and these ones always seem to jump up onto the screen when I decide what to do with myself. Its just easier to post a quick cute pic than it is to come up with a whole proper post. I have a hundred stories bubbling inside me, and perhaps now with the holidays coming up, I will take the time to put some up on these pages.
Dont' forget I have the three blogs. This is my primary blog where I post the "nice" stuff, and I have a rant blog http://yusefsjournal2.blogspot.com/ for when I get pissed off. And of course I have my work blog. Since my work is so very interesting, I often decide to post on that one instead of posting here. http://southtowerarmouringguild.blogspot.com/
But I would not post at all if it was not for nice folks like yourself who drop in from time to time and let me know that the world exists outside of this keyboard.

I also seem to have two identities! The "stag" identity which is so familiar to people, and the "bill" identity which ties into my brand new gmail account. This is kind of cool, in a scary sort of way, since I didn't plan it!