Greetings..

Shamelessly ripped off from the "Daily Nooze" My fave is the name of the cat...grin!

Rejected ideas from the staff of Hallmark Cards, as reported by The Associated Press:

Christmas
Front: Spread some holiday cheer.
Inside: Or drink alone. Who am I to judge?

Front: Christmas just wouldn't be the same without peanut brittle.
Inside: Or Jesus.

Birthday
Front: My ex-girlfriend had a cat named Love because she said that's what it gave her.
Inside: So I called it Bloody Forearms. Hope no one gets YOU a cat for your birthday.

Front: I wanted to give you a body piercing for your birthday.
Inside: But I didn't think I could get you drunk enough to where you wouldn't feel the stapler!

Wedding & Engagement
Front: Marriage is a bond that is unbreakable except by two-thirds of the population.
Inside: But it's you top-third couples that give the rest of us hope.

Miscellaneous
Front: When I think of you, Mom, I swell with pride.
Inside: At least I hope it's pride. Otherwise, I'm pregnant again.

Front: (Picture of Happy Face)
Inside: Hi! Welcome back from your coma!